I was racing Sport Class on a stock Bianchi Boss, the orange year. He wore a denim jacket and b&w high-top Vans. He was drunk. I wore Nema shorts and SPD compatible Airwalks. I was drunk. While wandering through the EAZE-UP vendor village one afternoon, we bonded over our mutual disdain for the Shockster, an aftermarket rear-suspension unit which, if you were willing to spend $235 to extend your wheel base half a foot, add 15 pounds to your bike, and suffer a bunch of extremely debilitating lateral movement, would augment your otherwise rigid bicycle with 1-2 inches of suspension-like squish.